We All Married Idiots by Elaine W. Miller

Posted by on Jul 7, 2017 | 4 comments

We All Married Idiots by Elaine W. Miller

We All Married Idiots. What great a title for a book! I know you will enjoy meeting my guest this week, Elaine Miller, hearing about how this book came to be, and the ministry the Lord has given her. Leave a comment and sign in on the Rafflecopter at the bottom for even more chances to win a print copy! 



Fabulous Fridays

We All Married Idiots

Welcome, Elaine! Please share a little about yourself and your family.

I packed my husband’s bags three times the first year we were married. How thankful I am for a husband who held on to our marriage when I wanted to let go. Married 46 years, Dan and I share a wonderful life and ministry together. Twelve years into our marriage, we sensed God’s call into full-time Christian service. An ordained minister, Dan and I have led many marriage retreats and counseled numerous hurting couples. For years we traveled annually to Europe as Pastoral Care Couple to missionaries there. My greatest joy is sharing the hope of Christ through my speaking and writing. God blessed us with three amazing children and twelve (and still counting) precious grandchildren. What gifts my Lord and my family are to my heart.

You have 3 books in print. Tell us something about each of them and a little about how you began writing on marriage and mothers.

Ha! Being a writer was never on my “to do” list. But I did keep journals of all God was teaching me, with hopes that when I was dead, my grandchildren would find those journals and learn of their grandmother’s faith. One Sunday my husband was preaching on the Parable of the Talents. In that Parable, God is angry at the lazy servant who buried his talents. As I listened, God spoke to my heart What good are all your writings if they stay buried in a file cabinet. Yikes! I knew I was to write a book, but I didn’t have a clue how to write a book. So, I went to Montrose Christian Writer’s Conference where the teacher said, “Write what you are passionate about.” I thought about it and the first thought that came to my mind was I was passionate about being a mom and I was passionate about my bath.

Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Moms is a beautiful hard cover gift book with 30 timeless devotions for moms of all ages. Bathtime Reflections for Drained Moms sold well, so the publisher wanted another book.

I thought, what else am I passionate about? My marriage.

Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Wives is another beautiful hard-cover gift book of 30 devotions to encourage marriages when they feel like throwing in the towel.

E-mails began arriving encouraging me to write a Bible study on marriage because we had a marriage story that needed to be told.

We All Married Idiots – 3 Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and 10 Things You Can is a 13 chapter book with discussion and application questions after each chapter. Idiots is a fun, easy read. If a reader had never opened a Bible, they will come away knowing what God says about marriage. At the request of missionaries, We All Married Idiots has been translated into Spanish and Bosnian. What a thrill for Dan and I to be invited to Bosnia in 2016 to teach marriage seminars to hundreds in four cities in Bosnia/Herzegovina.

I love the title of We All Married Idiots! How did that come about?

Years ago, when Dan and I were having an argument, I thought, but I did not say, I must have been an idiot to marry that idiot. Then I laughed realizing that made me an idiot too! Years later I learned that the word idiot comes from the Greek meaning “common man.” We are all common man and common woman. Our spouse is not God. When we look to our husband or wife to fulfill needs that only Jesus Christ can fulfill, then we have marriage problems.

We All Married Idiots book giveaway

How do you keep your readers involved in between books, and what is the most exciting part of being able to interact with your readers?

Nothing increases my readership like my speaking ministry. I love ministering to women and to couples of all ages on many topics. What joy it is to meet readers face to face at an event and learn God changed their lives through my books. Social media is a great way to connect with readers.  On the We All Married Idiots  Facebook page I give daily marriage encouragements. What a thrill when a Bosnian woman told me she begins each day by reading my Facebook posts. Of course, a blog is an effective way to keep in touch with readers and for them to keep in touch with you.

What is one of your favorite Biblical passages (or books) to study through?

“Let us fix our eyes on Jesus. . . .” Hebrews 12:2 (NIV) because humans will always disappoint you, but Jesus never will. Whenever I get discouraged, I check my eyes.

What’s your biggest challenge in balancing writing time with your other responsibilities?

I love speaking and speaking takes preparation as well as time away from family. It is also a form of writing, so it satisfies that inner need I have to write. Plus, I sell more books when I speak than I do elsewhere. So, speaking and writing work together for good. Many writers are introverts. Not me. I love people. A computer is not a person, so I can only write a short time before I go out and play. All of this is why my books are published years apart.

What are three things that have had the most influence on your writing process?

Writers’ Conferences, a local writers’ group that meets at least monthly, books on writing like Elements of Style.

How do you do your research?

Before I write a word, I research my heart for any sin that is keeping me from hearing what God wants me to write. Daily study of scriptures helps me know God’s heart on every subject I write. Google is a wealth of knowledge, as every writer knows.

Do you have any more books in the works?

Yes. Two years ago I was diagnosed with leukemia. Treatment has stopped the leukemia’s progression, so I am fine and expect to live many years (and I didn’t lose my hair!). When I first received the diagnosis I said, “To God be the glory.” God has taught me so much in these two years and continues to teach me as I meet cancer patients and hear their stories.  How can God get the glory if I don’t write about it? The title is under wraps, but the premise is to encourage cancer patients and their families to find the good from a bad diagnosis.

Please share an excerpt from whichever book you decide to offer in for a giveaway.

From We All Married Idiots, Chapter titled “Let Go!”

“Mistakes are almost always unintentional. But how we respond is intentional We choose to let go or not.

Dan and I nestled in for the night planning to watch a favorite movie he pre-recorded. Excited and exhausted, I anticipated a time of rest with my lover. Popcorn, comfy jammies, a fire in the fireplace, we cuddled on the couch. Ready—set—go—press the remote—bam! Nothing. The movie he intended to taped had not been taped after all. Somehow, he made a mistake and pressed a button other than “record.” We both were disappointed. He was sorry. I was angry. About to ask him how he could have done something so idiotic, I remembered to let go.

Such a simple thing. The words I chose to say, or not say, would make or break our evening. I held my tongue, and we went to sleep in each other’s arms in front of a roaring fire. It was nice. Had I spoken the words I felt, we may have ended the night on separate sides of our marriage bed. I chose to love and let go instead of get angry and ridicule.”

Book Blurb:

I married an idiot—and so did my spouse. The word idiot is derived from the Greek word meaning “common man.” Aren’t we all common man? In fact, there is only One who was uncommon man—Jesus Christ. Elaine W. Miller encourages couples to keep their eyes fixed on Jesus and run a marriage marathon like an idiot, but not like a fool. An idiot may stumble or fall, but a fool runs the wrong way. We All Married Idiots teaches husbands and wives to stop concentrating on the three things they will never change in their marriage, and begin focusing on the ten things they can. Then each will esteem their mate as a gift to treasure, not an idiot to tolerate.

About the author:

Elaine Miller authorElaine W. Miller is a popular international author and speaker known for sharing biblical insights with warmth, enthusiasm, and humor. A member of the Advanced Writers and Speakers Association, she has been encouraging audiences for over 25 years.  Elaine has been a featured guest on radio and television, a keynote retreat speaker and seminar leader, and a faculty member at several writer’s conferences.

Elaine is the author of three books: We All Married Idiots – 3 Things You Will Never Change About Your Marriage and 10 Things You Can (available in English, Spanish, and Bosnian), Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Moms, and Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Wives. Her writing is in Sanctuary: A Devotional Bible for Women, as well as several magazines.

Elaine and her husband, an ordained minister, have been married 45 years. Together they have led many marriage retreats and counseled numerous hurting couples. For many years they travelled annually to Europe as pastoral care couple to International Workers in Bosnia. Residing in upstate New York, she and her husband enjoy a wonderful and sometimes idiotic life together. Three married children and ten grandchildren complete their joy.

For more information, please see her website, www.SplashesofSerenity.com  or connect with her at Elaine W. Miller on Facebook, Twitter, or Pinterest.

Connect with Elaine:

Website: www.SplashesofSerenity.com

Book Trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-dT1KHCmFSs&t=6s

Facebook Author Page: https://www.facebook.com/Elaine-W-Miller-202625069765960/  

Facebook We All Married Idiots Page: https://www.facebook.com/WeAllMarriedIdiots/

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/elainewmiller/pins/

Google+: https://plus.google.com/s/Elaine%20W.%20Miller/top

Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/ElaineWMiller

Twitter: https://twitter.com/ElaineWMiller

Book Links:

We All Married Idiotshttps://www.amazon.com/We-All-Married-Idiots-Marriage/dp/0984765522

Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Momshttps://www.amazon.com/Splashes-Serenity-Bathtime-Reflections-Drained/dp/193258756X/

Splashes of Serenity: Bathtime Reflections for Drained Wiveshttps://www.amazon.com/Splashes-Serenity-Bathtime-Reflections-Drained/dp/1600980023/

We All Married Idiots cover

a Rafflecopter giveaway


  1. Finally finding time to read for enjoyment and insight again- must add this to my TBR. Thanks!

    • We All Married Idiots is a short, easy read with life-long impact. Enjoy the laughs and the heart-changes.

  2. I am excited as I pray for the person who will win a free copy of We All Married Idiots. Thanks to all who enter this rafflecopter. Even if you have a copy already, think of the people you could bless by giving this copy away.

  3. This sounds both fun and informative. Thanks for this giveaway!

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